Geography and Climate of Heaven

Located in a unplotted, secluded valley some place that looks like the eastern Alps, Heaven is approximately the size of 17 football fields all covered in dirt. The soil is rich in vitamin Alpha-Omega and the temperature ranges from 15-1,743,928 degrees depending on how bright the light of God is. This ideal climate is perfect for growing your own Garden of Eden (which is in fact already in heaven).

An abundant food source is the Tree of Life from which the Forbidden Fruit grows. The Forbidden Fruit, being the flavor of Starburst, proves that Starbursts were created by God, not by slave angels or heck-ians as previously believed.

Here's a rundown on heaven's famous spots. These were actually created before the abominations in hell were ever conceive. Because Satan has strong jealousy issues, he created the counterparts to this places as soon as he was forced to plummet into the depths of hell:

• Skittles River (opposed to Limbo)- it is the most beautiful river as it is rainbow-colored and perfectly drinkable. It is strange that no ants dwell here despite its high sugar content, and diabetics can partake of its delicious waters, for they are not allowed to eat of the forbidden fruit in the communal orchards
• Virtue's Acropolis (opposed to Sin City)- the capital of heaven, known for its technology that exceeds all things comprehensible by all collective intelligences of the universe. God's throne and He himself are both here.
• Chastity Canyon (opposed to Lust Lane)- how about a little (actually humongous) reward for those poor saps with frigidity issues, or those who decided to stay chaste as earthlings are just so repulsive? This canyon should really be more appropriately titled as the Hottie Haven.
• Temperance Tower (opposed to Gluttony Grove)- resembles the Leaning Tower of Pizza in several ways, as the chefs here cook the best pizzas that appeal to all tastes. those who have decided to be vegans or eat little back on earth can feast eternally, and eat whatever it is they haven't eaten back on earth due to fasting
• Charity Canyon (opposed to Avarice Avenue)- another great canyon beside the Chastity Canyon, where you receive gifts every single day as tribute to your unmaterialistic lifestyle back on earth. Whatever material pleasure it is you missed out on in earth, you shall enjoy here. You get everything here for free, so you never have to steal again
• Peace Plains (opposed to Wrath Wellspring)- hippies abound in this place
• Diligence Dale (opposed to Sloth Stateside)- you have worked hard in your days, and your reward is an eternal stay in this 5-star spa where you never have to work hard again
• Humility Harbor (opposed to Pride Park)- a beautiful harbor where you relive that time when you were exalted. If you never had that moment, oh, you will live like a king here after you have humbled yourself back in the days.
• Kindness Kame (opposed to Envy's Esquinita)- the rich kid back you try so hard not to envy in those days kindly shares with you his/her expensive stuff as reward for at least trying not to envy the person.
• Garden of Eden (opposed to Styx)- food a-plenty, and just like in Hell's Pride Park, everyone is naked, but people don't get embarrassed from such. In fact, they love it that way. In this garden are unicorns, Phoenix, the breathmint-breathing dragon, and other majestic creatures.
• Olympus Coliseum (opposed to the Heretic Sports Complex)- not really a sports complex. It is actually a high-tech lab where you can just sit down and fine-tune your body's figure without draining yourself of your energy in boring exercise. But if you want real sports, you can swim in the waters of Beimeni (pool of youth), jog in the golden paths of El Dorado, or spar with the hot Valkyries in Valhalla, or get to master the esoteric Camelot martial arts with hottie King Arthur as your guru.
• Wonderland (opposed to Fraudland)-a fascinating zoo where you get to meet extinct animals for real (don't worry for the dinosaurs and all the others have been tamed). It's like getting in the movie Ice Age for real as it is also pretty cold here. As the heaven population is pacifist, there is a fun arcade game here where you can see a simulation of whoever has made your life miserable on earth and torment them. The more distorted the simulation is, the more points you score. Huzzah! And you don't hurt a single thing.
• Lake Cocytus (seemingly opposed to a similarly named place)- really. It is only one place in both heaven and hell. It is a permanently frozen lake, perfect ice skating and hockey all year round. It is also a mysterious portal between heaven and hell, so that heaven's citizens can check out hell at least- also to make the citizens in hell suffer as they realize that they will never be with the person, as all people in heaven are gorgeous despite the fact that majority of them looked repulsive back in the days. The annual heaven v.s. hell hockey and ice skating games are also held here.

Another great thing about Heaven is that anyone who is currently living in Heaven will be granted amazing and completely random super powers, like the ability to shoot blood out of the eyes, listen to other peoples conversations from afar or twisting their own halos into various shapes and sizes

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You Really Look Marvelous Today!

Yours True Liars,

SoundaryaNayaki സൌണ്ടാര്യനായകി சௌந்தர்யநாயகி
Anna Justin അണ്ണാ ജസ്റിന്‍  அன்னா ஜஸ்டின்    

We are the perfect liars; don't try to find any truth in our words!

You never shared a cup of tea, a glass of wine,  or any matter which we love!
Then, how can you expect us to share the truth! Are you a stupid?

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OOPS, you may be looking for more lies, read this document to become a perfect liar: http://the.secret.angelfire.com/intelligence.pdf


Great, you may have a desire to make everyone look like an ass. This document may help you to  'MAKE EVERYONE LOOK LIKE AS AN ASS' : http://the.secret.angelfire.com/intelligence.pdf

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With malice toward none;
With charity for all;
With firmness toward right,
Shine with justice and truth!
Bloom forever, O beloved fellow men and woman,
From the dust of my bosom!

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No one is hurt by doing the right thing!

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Why Math has been hated by some? Because it requires them to think and forces them to give the correct and exact value. Because it has a clear distinction of right and wrong. Most people love to speak about any issue but hate to accept that they're wrong. That's the beauty of Math. Right is right and wrong is wrong.

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No one is poor but he who thinks himself so.

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The secret behind getting right answer answer from nature lies in putting right questions to her!

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SIVASHANMUGAM'S INCLUSION PRINCIPLE STATES THAT NO TWO THINGS CAN BE WITHOUT A COMMON PROPERTY.

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